Nobody ever crossed the Red Sea that way...there's always a first time!
This is a bit of a personal post, but I thought that maybe other LDS nomads - specifically single young adults - feel the same as me and that maybe I could learn from my readers. So, trying not to let myself feel too vulnerable, I'm going to share what has been in my heart recently. :)
I'm in a transition period of my life. I feel like the Lord is preparing me to transition to something. Problem is, I have no idea what I'm transitioning to. (Sound familiar?)
I'm praying to know where in the world He would have me go and also praying to know if He wants me to stay here in Utah for a time. (Something that is not necessarily my first choice, but definitely an option if it's His will.)
Here's the thing. I often feel pulled between two approaches to life: 1) waiting on the Lord for an answer before acting, and 2) moving foward with my goals until I get an answer to my prayers for direction.
It's always a wonderful thing when these two approaches match up and I find myself getting an answer from the Lord to focus on a specific goal. But lately I feel like I'm not getting many answers and I do not know if I should just move forward with my dreams (i.e. travel) or stick around in Utah until I get clear direction.
I have had many wonderful opportunities to travel the globe. But as I've gotten older, I have realized that the Lord wants me to travel with a reason. (The Deaf Dream being one of those reasons.) More specifically, however, I feel deep in my soul that I am supposed to live and serve in the branches of the Church around the world.
I know it's not a typical way to settle down, but I feel like it's what the Lord wants me to do. A couple of weeks ago, I felt like maybe this couldn't my path because it was too different than what many of my friends are doing with their lives. Then I read Elder Holland's talk, Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence and this line stood out to me:
"You may, like Alma going to Ammonihah, have to find a route that leads an unusual way... Nobody had ever crossed the Red Sea this way, but so what? There's always a first time."
This is the Lord we're talking about. He could totally arrange everything Himself for me to allow me to be in the branches of the Church. But, like most times in my life, He tends to wait for me to open doors and find creative ways to make my dreams happen and then either supports me or lets me know (usually very quickly) that I need to change directions in my life.
So I struggle between taking the lead and moving forward with my dreams until I get a confirmation or "waiting upon the Lord" until His will is revealed.
"Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed." (D&C 123:17)
Then there is the whole deal of wanting to get married. I'm seeking to be in the right place at the right time so that I can meet someone who also feels called to serve in the branches of the Church. I'm sure there are good LDS men out there who want to do this, but sometimes I get nervous that I won't meet them here in Utah. Nomads in their late 20s tend to already be abroad if that is their goal, right?
But again, this is the Lord we're talking about. I'm sure He can help me find a fellow nomad anywhere (including Utah). :)
As strongly as I feel that being in the branches is one of my callings in life, I also feel strongly that I will be able to serve hand-in-hand in these branches with a fellow nomad. I am doing all I can to meet these kind of men and live a full, vibrant life in the meantime.
"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness." (D&C 58:27)
I guess, as I finish this post, I am hoping to hear from others who feel similarly to me. It's hard to be in a transition period of life and not feel any direction (yet) on where I should be and who I should meet. Praying for some answers soon...
Nearly our entire Relief Society in the Istanbul, Turkey branch. :)